Entourage's Sloan to Be the New Face of Sloan-Kettering Memorial Hospital

NEW YORK, New York (AP) – Actress Emmanuelle Chriqui, known as her portrayal of “Sloan,” E’s girlfriend, on HBO’s hit show Entourage, will be the new face of the Sloan-Kettering Memorial Hospital, officials announced today.

The hospital, referred to as Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center (MSKCC) in medical journals, is starting a 3-year campaign that promotes health and beauty.

“Sloan has the ideal look for portraying our new image,” said board chairman Douglas A. Warner III. “She’s young, she’s healthy–she projects success.”

The institute prides itself on connecting physicians with researchers on a daily basis, “not unlike how Sloan connected with that blonde girl in the threesome episode,” explained Warner.

On the show, Sloan is the daughter of a wealthy owner of a talent agency. In her first appearance, she flirts briefly with movie star Vincent Chase, but ultimately reveals that her interests lie in the diminutive Eric, or “E.”

“We think Sloan will show our children that they can choose practical approaches to healing themselves–the “E’s” of medicine, if you will–over flashy, risky, untested procedures,” said Center president Harold Varmus. “We believe that she will inspire good decisions.”

When asked for comment, Sloan replied, “You guys know that my real name is Emmanuelle, right?” She followed her remarks with, “Why is my face on that banner?”

Copyright 2009 The Ass Press.