Obama Wins Additional Nobel Prizes

STOCKHOLM, Sweden (AP) – A few days after receiving the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize, President Obama was awarded his second, third, and fourth Nobel prizes over the Columbus Day weekend.

Obama told reporters that he was “shocked, humble, and inspired” by himself.

obama nobelIn addition to the Peace prize, Obama will receive Nobel prizes in Economics, Medicine, and Chemistry.

“I didn’t even know they had one for chemistry,” he said in his acceptance speech.

The president of the Nobel committee, Thorbjorn Jagland (his real name), said that the decision to award Obama with an unprecedented four prizes came without debate.

“We knew when we made nominations last September that Obama was our guy,” Jagland said. “And I don’t mean this past September, like two weeks ago. I mean a year ago, before he was president, right after Hillary decided to drop out of the race and before Palin started talking all sorts of crazy.”

“In fact, we almost made up a new award just to give to O-Dawg.”

When asked what he would do with the awards, Obama shrugged and said, “I don’t know. Although it’s probably time that I actually do something.”

Copyright 2009 The Ass Press.