Hey Jamey!

I read this blog entry with great interest. Thanks for being so candid about your thoughts. I too have struggled with fears of the way marriage will change things. I was once engaged even, and boy did those fears surface then!

I will say that over the years, I’ve developed some thoughts on some of these fears – namely in choosing the “right” one. The more I’ve talked to happily married couples, the more I’ve seen a theme. Some people go on about just “knowing” or “God’s will” but many seasoned couples instead say that it wasn’t so much about one person being right for you, or fate, or even good feelings, but about sticking to your choice. You may have several choices for a spouse if you’re “hot stuff” haha – or even “choices” later down the road – but you stick with the vows you made to that one choice. That (barring horrid things like abuse), your choice to see through the ups and downs fuels, the “in love” and “out of love” seasons, builds a special bond and actually fuels the romantic feelings. In other words, really investing in your choice is the first big step in having a marriage like Billy Graham had – where he was even more in love with his wife in her later years than even on their wedding day!

In regards to kids… well they do change things, but hopefully for the better! I think just about every parent I know says there’s no way we’ll ever fully be “ready” to be a parent… you just become one and adapt along the way. Yet they wouldn’t go back to being childless for a million bucks. That has helped me overcome some of my feelings of “Whoa… that is SO life altering… ”

In regards to friends, well as a single woman with TONS of married friends, I have to say, I am looking forward to the day when I won’t be the odd one out in our group.

Anyway, sorry to ramble on.