Pillow Fights in Your Underwear

A female blogger friend of mine (Penelope over at Single Mom Adventures) recently mentioned to me that she is hosting a girl’s night this Friday. Of course, I immediately asked her if she and her friends would be having a pillow fight in their underwear. I felt wholly unoriginal saying that, and yet it was instinctual–I couldn’t not ask that question.

I have some theories about why guys ask that question, and I polled a few male friends to see what they thought. Their responses echoed mine. I’ll let them respond to that question, and I’ll answer the question, “What kind of response are we hoping for?” below.

Why do guys ask that question?

Friend 1: I’ve been socially conditioned to ask that question.  If I see a red light I put my foot on the brake. If I hear a school bell ring I get up and walk out of the room.   If I hear the term “girl’s night” I ask about pillow fighting in underwear.  I don’t think its instinctual on an evolutionary level, but its a conditioned response.  I am Pavlov’s dog.

Friend 2: We ask that question because it pops into our heads (due to the long-winded explanation I gave in the first e-mail). We’re not looking for much of a response. We know women don’t actually do this; it just gives us a chance to imagine them in their underwear. There’s a glimmer of hope that the woman will play along with you in your pillow fight scenario, and that just makes said woman a little more fun and sexy.

Friend 3: Men aren’t hoping for a response.  They are simply blurting out what they are imagining in their head; they want to picture girls fighting in underwear b/c it turns them on.

What kind of response are we hoping for?

This is hinted at above. There are two possible responses that will please us greatly:

  1. We want you to play along. Indulge us. Please. We don’t lead glamorous lives. All we’d like is for you to smile and say that you’re going to be “wearing lacy pink underwear with sexy bras (which, of course, match our panties)” (that’s a direct quote from Penelope’s blog entry on this subject). Tell us why you decided to discard your clothes in the first place. Tell us that you might just kiss. Please.
  2. We want you to admit that you’re going to have a pillow fight in your underwear. Somewhere out there, there’s a group of beautiful women who get together for game night and end up standing on a bed in their underwear with pillows in hand. This is the unicorn of female groups, the bigfoot, the elusive cockatoo. It simply must exist. If us men want to have a fighting chance of finding it, we need to ask this question. And if you’re in that marvelous group, you need to respond truthfully.

One of the above friends pointed out that there actually is a Pillow Fight League. It’s an awesome idea, although judging by the photos (which are, unfortunately, completely safe for work), there is no underwear involved. Too bad. But I’ll still watch. Maybe they’ll kiss.