I received some devastating news today.
If mankind continues consuming chocolate at the rate we’re currently on, in 20 years, chocolate will be too expensive for the average person to afford.
I’m the average person. That’s me. This is terrible.
The obvious solution is that the rest of you should stop eating chocolate immediately so that I can continue to consume it at my normal rate.
However, some of you may not support that proposal. So really, there’s only one other solution: Riots in the street followed to a last-man-standing battle to the death, with the winner being awarded the sole right to eat chocolate.
May the best man win.