Due to the abundance of quality grievances this year, I picked 50 out of the 135 or so written down at my Festivus party (some of which were originally posted by readers on this blog) and sent them to my friend Leo (none of the judges were at the party). Leo narrowed the list to 40 grievances, chose his favorite 30, and then ranked 31-40 from those that remained. I then sent the top 30 to another person, and then the top 20, and so on. Thus the Top 10 will be posted on Thursday evening for your viewing pleasure. Check below to see if you made the prestigious Top 40 list!
40. Shots in the butt–I never realized how much I use my right butt cheek until my dignity was punctured.
39. Chik-fil-a—Jesus would have wanted your delicious food on Sundays too.
38. The end of Inception. Come on, Christopher Nolan. You’ve proved that you’re very clever. Now just tell us if the top stops spinning.
37. Asian drivers! (submitted by an Asian)
36. Ataturk—For making me think “attaboy” every time I see your name.
35. That the all-edge brownie pan is only available through Skymall.
34. Animals watching me pee.
33. Glenn Beck: For the greatest misuse of a chalkboard, ever.
32. I tell you to write the account numbers on the form and you write the words “account numbers.”
31. Text message abbreviations, even in text messages. No, I don’t know what “10Q 4 d hlp 2day!” means. Can’t you just spell out the words?
Check back tomorrow for 21-30!