Yes, I cheated–I skipped the “best comments” post for February. These take a bit of work, and February had an immense number of comments thanks to the Tournament of Awkwardness. Plus, I wanted to leave some room for fresh content on the blog, and the tournament was taking up a lot of space.
But I do love your comments almost as much as my cats, so I’m happy to bring back this feature. I won’t let you down again.
The Grand Finale of Awkwardness resulted in 104 comments, which is the most ever on a single entry on this blog, surpassing the previous titleholder, Should I Go on This Date?. Many of the comments are hilarious, as they feature two groups of people telling stories about how awkward Kendall and Sarah are. My favorite of all of those comments–one of my favorite comments ever on this blog–is Kendall’s defense of her lack of coolness:
Let me put a stop to this “Kendall was a popular kid” business. I was not. Would a popular kid wear a Christmas shawl for a week before learning from her sister that it was in fact a tree skirt? Would a popular kid not only be photographed in a disco ball jacket but wear it proudly to school everyday in hopes that it would help her make friends? Would a popular kid be so proud that her rubber band racer was still in the hall of fame at her high school? Or better yet, even keep in touch with her 9th grade science teacher enough to know that fact? No she wouldn’t. I was not popular. Vote Kendall!
Just to even the score, a friend of Sarah’s had a very revealing story to tell as well:
[Sarah] is so catastrophically awkward that even in a foreign country people pick her out as the weak link in the herd. I’ve seen it happen with my own eyes during a medical trip to the Dominican Republic. We were all dressed in the exact same scrubs, so it wasn’t as though Sarah was flying the freak flag, but somehow the locals still knew.
A lady came straight up to her, said that Sarah’s uterus must be old and shriveled, but that she was sure she could probably still find some “very potent” Dominican men who could impregnate Sarah.
That’s awkward enough on its own, but Sarah was really flustered so as she turned to go she tripped over her own feet and fell flat on the ground. Instead of helping her up, the Dominican lady just handed her a man’s phone number and said “You’ll need this VERY much.”
Catastrophically. Awkward. On multiple continents.
When I revealed that I had a mole removed, I asked people for suggestions on the Thaddeus’ (the mole) future plans. Katy came up with this list so fast it was as if she had already thought about it:
Some other ideas of possible jobs for Thaddeus could include, but are not limited to:
1. Movie Theater Ticket Taker
2. Underwear Model (do moles even need underwear?)
3. Fortune Cookie Fortune Writer
4. Pet Food Taster
This comment is from a 2-month-old post about why I believe that Joey and Rachel were better for each other than Ross and Rachel, but the comment was posted in March, so it’s fair game. Very few people agreed with me, so it made my day to see that at least one person did. Thank you, Jen (no, as far as I can tell she’s not Jennifer Aniston).
Hey me too! I think that Joey and Rachel were much cuter together than Ross and Rachel. At the very base level, Ross has some serious commitment issues ie. Multiple marriages, sleeping with someone when you just broke up or took a break (not only the Ross and Rachel break thing but before when he found out Carol was lesbian, he and Phoebe were about to go at it). Besides how do you as a woman really forget that at anytime you have a break, he’ll go out and cheat on you. Joey seems like an overall nicer and more honest guy. Rachel and Joey had great chemistry. Wish they would’ve been given more of a shot.
That’s it for March! Thank you all for your comments, and I’ll see you in April!