(p.s. – Thanks for mentioning my site!)

I can definitely relate to what you’re saying about professional sports. Like you, I don’t get it, and for the most part I’m glad that sports make people happy, even if they think of them as more than entertainment. I think there’s a lot of anguish and even hate that professional sports instill in people when they reach a certain level of fandom–I’m not a fan of that. That’s scary. It’s almost on the same level as religious fanatics.

I think the only thing I, as a male, can say to your second paragraph is: I’m sorry. Just as Olympic athletes represent their countries by default, I (and other men) represent all men by default. I’m sorry, for all of us, and I applaud your willingness to share so that other women can find the strength to open up.

In case Cara inspires other women through these posts, you can contact her through her website: http://www.caralopezlee.com/

My perspective is (admittedly) based on the culture of an aging world though. During the Renaissance (I think the Olympics were on hiatus then), people could be married as young as 12, which wasn’t a huge deal, because you may only live to 35. Now that we’re living into our 80s and 90s, we write off everything before 18 or so to “learning the ropes” of life. My point being that perhaps we (I) erroneously discount the perspectives of people in their second decade (10-19).

But, I don’t understand professional competitive sports either. I understand the interest and benefits of PLAYING any sport, at any age. I understand the benefits of teamwork and the positive association between dedication and performance. But I don’t understand how any person would want to define themselves (professionally) based on your their last physical performance, or in comparison against another person/persons/team. I can’t get interested because players perform, and teams win and lose entirely independent of me. Good for them that they compete, and that they win. But, for the most part, I can’t find a way to feel like it matters to me. I’m glad when the cardinals win the world series, because it makes other people happy. But I don’t get it.

(These thoughts are more stream of conscious, but are all inspired by this post).

I was drugged and robbed on a train when I left Italy. As for the sexual assault, I neither want to overstate nor understate this, but when I was in Greece a man exposed himself and masturbated in front of me. While that event from my book was not a full-on rape, once when I was traveling in Mexico a man did physically grab me and attempt to rape me. In high school, I was drugged and date-raped. While these events were not all created equal, they were all sexual assaults and as such were all frightening and emotionally haunting. Travel may have put me at more risk, but I still support solo female travel because the risks can be mitigated.

Thanks for your thoughts. These are all really interesting. I hadn’t thought about the toll it takes on anyone to go all-in for something they’re passionate about–that’s very true. And I think you make a great distinction between an adult making that choice for themselves and an adult making that choice for a child (or an adult letting a child make that choice when they don’t fully understand the consequences).

I don’t remember the part of your book when the train robbery or the sexual assault happened–I’m so sorry to hear that. Where are those stories in the book?

I don’t necessarily agree with your last paragraph, but I respect your opinion.

Jamey