The Printer Whisperer

23326740i_01 We all have skills, hidden talents that rise to the surface at the right time, like Harry Potter realizing that he was naturally good at Quidditch.

When we learn about those innate skills, it’s like we realize that we’ve known a second language all of our lives but didn’t have a chance to use it. Then one day you’re walking along, minding our own business, and someone needs help with their sink or their hamster or their cornrows. And you realize then that you have a special ability.

Hi, I’m Jamey, and I’m the Printer Whisperer.

Every office has someone who by default takes care of the random tech needs that arise from day to day. Low-level stuff–the kind of stuff that IT will mock you for if you call them in.

I’m not saying I’m the best at fixing random office technology. I’m sure there are many out there who are far more savvy then me. But when it comes to printers, I can speak to them. I can feel them. The printer and I are one.

I’m not kidding when I say that I can put my ear to a printer to take its pulse, to listen to its aches and pains, its needs and wants. I let the printer know that I am no different than it. I’m nothing but a complex machine who wants a few simple things out of life. I get the printer, and the printer gets me.

If a printer is hurting, I’m almost always able to figure out that one spot where it needs to be touched and caressed back to life. You have to feel that vibration, that hum of life churning inside of it, wanting to be released. Sometimes you have to probe deep inside to find that one little scraggle of paper, but it’s worth it. That, my friends, is where you find a true connection.

What is your hidden talent, the secret language you speak with an appliance, animal, or mechanism?