The Top 10 Festivus Grievances of 2013

malcolm-in-the-middleEnding our week-long list of grievances is this year’s Top 10. A big thanks to Josh for ranking these. May the crowd be in your favor.

10. When people walk at an intersection even though the walk light isn’t on. I need to make my turn!

9. That Breaking Bad didn’t end with the FBI giving Walter White a new identity as the suburban father of 4 in “Malcolm in the Middle.”

8. Cat food that’s more expensive than my food.

7. When your car stops making that rattle as soon as you go to the mechanic.

6. When I Google “why do”, it autofills “why does my … itch?”

5. Seedful grapes.

4. Deceptively shallow pints of ice cream.

3. When the doctor tells you there’s nothing wrong. I’d rather be sick than crazy.

2. That semicolons are more frequently used as emoticons instead of as proper punctuation.

1. When you e-mail someone and they call in response. If I wanted to hear your voice, I would have picked up the phone in the first place.

Happy Festivus!