guy talk

Why You Should Go to the Doctor When You Notice a Lump

Today I got a rather shocking group e-mail from a friend about a recent development in his life. I’m really grateful that he shared his story, and I asked him if I could post it on my blog so it might benefit you as it benefited me. He asked to remain anonymous, hence the lack […]


My New Lady Friend

You know how they say, “When you know, you know?” I now know what they’re talking about. I don’t think I’ve mentioned it here on the blog, but I got back on Match and OkCupid a few months ago. I got sucked back in by the illusion of e-mails from yoga-pants wearing women with top-notch […]


How Does One Drink Out of a Beer Bottle on a Date?

The easy answer to this question is, duh, don’t drink beer out of a bottle on a date. Pour it into a glass. But let’s say you don’t have that option. Or you don’t want that option because you like drinking beer out of a bottle. Hypothetically. When you bring the bottle to your lips, […]


Trunk Club Unboxing

Finally, another video blog! This one is a little longer than the time travel vlog and the ladder golf vlog, but I can promise that I edited it quite a bit, so every moment matters. Also, the cats make numerous appearances. There’s even a special “director’s cut scene” at the end, just like the bonus […]


How to Screw Yourself on Facebook

How to Screw Yourself on Facebook

On Saturday afternoon, a friend showed me a clever play on a wedding invitation. I laughed, shared it on Facebook with the message “There is merit to this,” and turned off my phone to watch The Amazing Spider-Man (it’s amazing!). Check out the image I posted and see if you can guess the responses I had when […]


The Male Lactation Discrepancy

The Male Lactation Discrepancy

Two friends of mine recently had a baby. Cute little thing. Tiny hands, tiny feet, cries a lot. When I met the baby for the first time, the husband commented that for the month since the baby was born, he’s been pretty much useless. And not for lack of trying. It’s just that the baby’s […]


The Art of Flirtation: An Awkward Male’s Perspective

The Art of Flirtation: An Awkward Male's Perspective

This is a Mars vs. Venus entry, meaning I’m going to share my male perspective, and then at the end of the entry you can click over to my blogger friend Katy’s blog for the female perspective on flirting. I’ve always enjoyed flirting, but over the past year I’ve had a series of epiphanies about […]


7 Additional Things Every Man Should Know

7 Additional Things Every Man Should Know

As usually, most of these are gender neutral. So unless you want a day off from my daily blog, ladies, you might find some value in these 7 tips. We’ll start where we left off last time: 29. Guy time doing a typical “guy” thing–like a poker night–is crucial. Remember back in the day, when […]


The Friends You Don’t Actually Know

The Friends You Don't Actually Know

Today’s rare guest entry is brought to you by long-time reader and oft-honored Comment of the Month recipient Brad. He taps into the world that we all float through every day, the world of people we see day after day–maybe at work, maybe in the park, maybe in your apartment building–and yet never really know […]


6 More Things Every Guy Should Know

6 More Things Every Guy Should Know

Of all of my “things guys should know lists,” this one is probably the most gender-neutral. That’s right: If you have a neutral gender, you might derive value from this list. Well, except for #25… Well pick up where we left off last time: 23. How to serve rice in a classy way. I learned […]


Should All Athletes Aspire to Be Tim Tebow?

Should All Athletes Aspire to Be Tim Tebow?

A few days ago I read a heartwarming article about the much-maligned Denver Broncos quarterback, Tim Tebow. Tebow was coming off a huge upset win over the Steelers despite a subpar season in which he completed fewer than 50% of his passes. The part that really got to me was this quote from Tebow: Here […]


First-World Dude Problem #2: The Midair Celebratory Bump

First-World Dude Problem #2: The Midair Celebratory Bump

Over the course of history, we’ve seen an evolution in the way that athletes celebrate after scoring a point or winning the game. The ancient Aztecs celebrated a victory in ullamaliztli by scalping their opponents. The Romans exchanged undergarments with their teammates whenever they had a shot come particularly close to the pallino in bocce. […]


Mindy Kaling’s 13 Rules for Guys

Mindy Kaling's 13 Rules for Guys

If you’ve seen The Office, you know Mindy Kaling as Kelly Kapoor. Kaling recently wrote a delightful book called, “Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (and Other Concerns),” and in it she outlines 13 specific things that all guys should do. Her rules are in bold; my responses follow each one. How many do women agree […]


First-World Dude Problem #1: Handshake vs. Hug

First-World Dude Problem #1: Handshake vs. Hug

This isn’t a debate about the best type of greeting for dudes. This is about the unfortunate situation that unravels when you greet someone with a handshake but they want a hug, or vice versa. At first glance, this is a fairly innocuous situation. But when you dissect it well beyond reasoning, you have a […]


Can a “Team Player” Make $200 Million?

Can a "Team Player" Make $200 Million?

Much ado will be made in the next few months about certain free agents in baseball who will be shopping around for bigger and better contracts. Each of them will inevitably claim that they’re trying to do what’s best for their family, and then when they’re signed for the maximum possible amount, they’ll say that […]


Entourage Ends

Entourage Ends

The HBO dramedy Entourage ended tonight with a short but sweet series finale. I won’t go into details about what happened, but I will say that everyone grows up in different ways. I’ve been watching the show on and off for 7 years, many of those years with a few good friends when they used […]


3 Extra Things Every Guy Should Know

3 Extra Things Every Guy Should Know

Continuing where we left off with the last lesson… 20. You can order cocktails and martinis, but order them on the rocks. There’s nothing wrong with a deliciously fruity drink now and then. But don’t go for the Sex in the City look–order your cocktails like a man. In a glass. With ice. And drink […]


The Costanza Wallet Solution

The Costanza Wallet Solution

I have a friend–we’ll call him “Mark” to give away his real name–who used to have a Costanza wallet. That is, a wallet so full of coupons, receipts, cards, and cash, that you’ll get scoliosis for sitting on it for too long. If you’re not familiar with the original Costanza wallet, watch the clip here. […]


Should You Lie About Your Age?

Should You Lie About Your Age?

Should you lie about your age on your online dating profile? Short answer: No. You should be completely truthful about your age, height, income, etc. You should use recent photos that actually look like you. Be 100% open and honest, because when you go on dates, they’ll know if you’ve been lying. Long answer: Still […]


The Psychology of Sex #12: High Risk, High Reward

The Psychology of Sex #12: High Risk, High Reward

If you want to fall in love, put yourself in a risky–even dangerous–situation. I’ve got proof. I read an article the other day about…well, essentially about the psychology of sex. The article started by summarizing a study done involving men who were put on a scary bridge with a female interviewer. One by one the […]


Let Men Fix Things…Sometimes

Let Men Fix Things...Sometimes

Yesterday I wrote about equality between men and women in terms of engagements and proposals. However, there’s one thing that I think all women should know about men: Let us fix things every now and then. Or at least try to fix things. The other day a female friend of mine had a flat tire […]


3 More Things Every Man Should Know

3 More Things Every Man Should Know

This is a follow-up to 8 Things Every Man Should Know and 8 More Things Every Man Should Know. Two of these apply to women too. 17. In the winter, as soon as it stops snowing, brush off your car immediately–even if you don’t need to drive until the following day. Sure, it sucks to […]


The Persuasive Power of Cleavage

The Persuasive Power of Cleavage

I am impressed by the persuasive power of cleavage. If you think about it, cleavage nothing. It’s literally the empty space between two objects. You put any other two objects together and the space between them is dull and uninteresting. But if those objects happen to be breasts, suddenly that space has the power to […]


Would You Let Her Eat Crackers in Bed?

Would You Let Her Eat Crackers in Bed?

I learned a new expression the other day: “I wouldn’t kick her out of bed for eating crackers.” Apparently this is said when a man encounters a truly incredible woman–he’s saying that she’s so amazing that he’d be okay with her doing just about anything. But eating crackers in bed? That’s where I draw the […]