Last month, after spending quite a bit of time determining the common traits of truly successful people in some area of their lives, I featured John Donovan’s story about health.

This month I’d like to feature another friend of mine, someone who I greatly admire for taking a huge risk and finding a way to make it pay off: Eric Silverstein of The Peached Tortilla in Austin, Texas.

I’m going to talk about how Eric embodies the following 7 traits when it comes to entrepreneurship:

1. Courageous
2. Action-Oriented
3. Focused
4. Devoted
5. Patient
6. Passionate
7. Absorbent

Just a little back story: I met Eric around 2004, maybe 2005, through another friend. We got to know each other through our passion for sports, women, and entrepreneurship. And over the years, I realized how much Eric loved food. He’s an excellent cook. So when he started sharing his concept for taking his love of food to the next level, it made perfect sense that he would actually do something about it. Here’s his story, encapsulated by the 7 Pillars. I’m using Eric’s words because his personality comes across really well in the interview, and I’ll follow with commentary in italics.

The Story of The Peached Tortilla 

In early 2009 I had an idea for a modern taco concept that nobody had yet created. At that time, Korean tacos were exploding in LA at the Kogi food truck. This was before Kogi had become a national brand. Also, when I had visited Atlanta, I noticed a a couple of popular restaurants incorporating Southern flavors into tacos. My idea was to incorporate both Asian and Southern flavors into a gourmet taco, fast casual concept. I wanted to put my own unique twist into it, using a lot of flavors that I had grown up eating. I drafted a business plan over the course of 5-6 months, and then in November 2010 started trying to raise money. After spending over 6-8 months raising capital, I decided to start with a food truck with the long term goal of opening a restaurant.

There’s not a whole lot I don’t do when running The Peached Tortilla. When I first started, I did literally everything. I did all the purchasing, payroll, social media, scheduling, day to day operations, bookings, etc. Now, I have taken myself out of the truck and have two managers running my day-to-day operation. I spend the majority of my time focusing on clients, ways to grow the concept, and marketing.

The Peached Tortilla currently has a 4-star rating on Yelp from 117 reviews.

Courageous

I gave up everything to start TPT.  I gave up a six figure job as a lawyer.  I gave up a salary for a year, health insurance, 401K benefits, all my favorite sports teams.  Not to mention all the money I invested into TPT.  You name it.  The only thing I didn’t give up was my girlfriend, my family, and my close friends.

I stood to lose a lot, the largest of which was my reputation.  I didn’t want to be known as the entrepreneur that failed (even though plenty fail).  I felt like people would have looked at me differently if I was the guy who took the leap and fell on his face.

You have to understand something about this when you read that Eric gave up sports. I mean, the job is obvious–he gave up a very secure, high-paying job. But he didn’t do so irresponsibly. He had a plan, he had investors, and he had saved up a lot of money. But sports…Eric used to watch every Atlanta Hawks game, every Atlanta Falcons game, and he spent quite a bit of time on fantasy baseball. If you’re a guy or a sports fan, think how big of a sacrifice it would be to simply give it all up for a bigger dream.

Action-Oriented

I asked Eric for the 3 things that took the most time and effort to learn. His response:

1. Staffing: it’s very hard to find loyal, competent employees and it has taken me a year to find a strong team.
2. Branding: Your brand is not built in a day, a week or a month.  It takes thousands of people to taste your food and hundreds of small and large events to get your name out there. You have to chisel away.
3. Finding Locations: In Austin, you can’t park your food truck on the street – it has to be on private property.  I have learned that it takes a great network for an operator to tap into the best locations for lunch and dinner service. 
   

Focused

When starting a new business, you’re going to hit an innumerable number of roadblocks. If you’re able to stay focused on the goal and keep going, you have a fighting chances. As Eric puts it:

The entire first year was a roadblock.  In April I was ready to throw in the towel.  I felt like people who I trusted took a dump on me.  I had staff steal from me.  I really felt like I had been kicked to the curb and was depressed at where I was in the process.  I went to sleep one night telling my girlfriend that I was done with the business; and I meant it.  I was ready to put in my 30-day notice to terminate my truck lease.

I never imagined it would be this hard; and I hated talking about it because I put myself in this position.  I was the one who wanted to open the business.

Things have gotten better incrementally since that month.  We won Eater Austin’s Food Truck of the Year for 2011.  We were Austin’s representative at the San Francisco Street Food Festival, cooking next to other out-of-city vendors like Seattle’s Skillet.  Long term, I want walls.  I want a restaurant.  I want to realize my dream from 3 years ago.

Devoted

Staffing is problematic.  I have learned that most people in this industry don’t have much respect for their potential employer.  The modern day hourly employee will quit on a dime without any notice.  Sometimes they won’t even show up for a scheduled interview (this has happened at least 6 times).  There is a severe lack of work ethic.  The more effort I have to spend on staffing, the more it takes my time away from doing things that will make the business more profitable.

Although staffing isn’t a problem in every industry, if you’re starting a new business, you’re going to run into at least one consistent, extremely annoying inconvenience that gets in the way of optimization. But you have to stick with it. The Peached Tortilla doesn’t work without a staff, so although Eric has to commit extra energy to finding good people, he knows it’s worth it.

Patient

It takes time to grow your brand.  Some restaurants explode on the scene, others grow steadily.  David Chang’s original noodle bar was a disaster at first but then he blew up on the scene.  For TPT, it has been a slow and steady ascent.  I never felt like we exploded suddenly.  I feel like all restaurant brands need to give themselves at least a year, if not more, for them to steadily establish themselves.

You can’t go into a startup thinking you’re going to be an overnight success. In fact, with that attitude you’re just setting yourself up for disappointment.

Passionate

My love of food was shaped by my childhood in Asia and my family.  In other parts of the world, it is less about how big your house is or how many cars you have, and more about great food and great company.  I really do embrace that.

Absorbent

My theory is that you have to constantly be absorbing and applying new knowledge to be a success. No food truck is an island.

I have learned a ton about mobile food over the past year and a half.  But I would stress that each market is different.  LA is different than New York which is different from Austin.  I overestimated the volume you could do in Austin for lunch.  Austin, even with a fairly large downtown workforce, does not boast a very dense population, which hurts food trucks.  Not to mention, there are over 2,000 permitted mobile food vendors.  Also, the parking laws really limit you in Austin.  Austin does not have the population of LA and New York.  I have learned to focus on other revenue streams to help us maintain profitability.

***

Everybody has a dream job. It might change over time, or maybe you have several. Whenever you think of a new dream job, read through these pillars and ask yourself honestly if you have what it takes to be a success in that position or that startup. It’s okay if you don’t–you can always have new dreams. But if you truly embody these traits when it comes to that dream, plan it and execute it. It might be the most satisfying–and successful–thing you’ll ever do.

Thanks, Eric, for sharing your story. I’m in awe of what you do, and I’m jealous of everyone in Austin who gets to eat at The Peached Tortilla.

For the past few months, I’ve been trying to formulate the common traits that successful people seem to embody regardless of the type of success. I think I have them figured out, and there are seven of them.

In this new series on the blog, I’m going to tell the stories of people (some who I know well, others who I don’t) who I consider highly successful in some area of their life, and I’m going to go through each of the seven traits for those people. I think we all have a lot to learn from these people. (If you have anyone you’d like to recommend for this series, please contact me at jamey.stegmaier@gmail.com.)

The John Donovan Story

In a way, John inspired this series. He’s a friend of mine who has gone through an incredible and inspiring physical transformation over the last year, and his story is worth sharing. Here’s John a year ago (this was taken before a year ago, but this is how he looked a year ago):

I’ve known John for about 8 years, and this is how I’ve always known him in terms of looks. Beyond that, John is quick-witted, extremely loyal, and an truly good-hearted person. His family’s heritage is Irish, and John embraces that heritage well beyond St. Patrick’s Day.

Here’s what John looks like today:

Again, this is about more than looks, but I wanted to start off with the physical transformation. Now let’s tell John’s story through the seven traits I mentioned above.

Courageous: It takes a lot of courage to admit to yourself that you aren’t who you want to be. A person can either structure their life around their limitations, or they can take control of their limitations and build the life they want. John is the latter type of person.

Even at 271 pounds, John wasn’t unhealthy in that he gorged on mountains of junk food.  But in retrospect, he realizes that he didn’t understand the relationship between the food that he ate and the shape of his body.  His physical activity was social, including some club sports.  But the recreational drinking associated with these clubs nullified much of the physical benefits of his activity.

But nonetheless, here he was, 6 months from his 30th birthday, and John knew he was overweight at 271 pounds. How did he know? Part of it was his big-picture perspective that his body and his lifestyle had shaped his body into something that was limited in the tasks it could perform. As John said in our interview, “[When playing pickup sports], usually I’d play a position that didn’t require me to run quickly or for an extended period. I didn’t want to set world records for speed. But I did want to be able to fly comfortably in an economy seat.”

The kicker came last January when John sat down on a friend’s porch swing and tore it right out of ceiling from which it was suspended. John could have blamed the ceiling or the swing, but instead he had the courage to realize that he was ready to make a change.

Action Oriented: Anyone can come up with a great idea or dream big. Successful people actually act on those ideas and dreams. And they don’t act a year from now or a month from now–they act today.

It’s worth mentioning that people can be action oriented in selective parts of their life, rather than their life as a whole.  John didn’t get a promotion and increase his net worth at the same time that he decided to go through this physical transformation. But he decided that action needed to be taken to improve himself physically.

John had tried to lose weight in the past and had been somewhat successful, but he hadn’t been able to keep off that weight. He knew he had to do something different this time.

So he called a gym and set up an appointment with weight-loss coach Charles D’Angelo. Charles had come highly recommended by a friend whose diabetic father had lost 100 pounds in the past year thanks to Charles’ guidance.

John says that aside from consulting with a coach, getting a gym membership this time was a big step. It was a new commitment, a key action in process of getting healthy. I doubt John will ever forget his first workout after getting guidance from Charles. Here’s a photo from right afterwards:

Focused: Early on, John set a goal and stuck with it. He wanted to weigh 200 pounds on his 30th birthday. John never took his sights off that goal, but he helped motivate himself with smaller goals. He had a new target weigh every 2 weeks.

Setting these smaller goals that would pave the way to achieving the overall goal is very important to this process.  Failing to meet one smaller goal was not catastrophic.   But failing to meet a few small goals over time meant a trend, and that new action would be needed to get back on track.

Devoted: Being focused is about the vision. Being devoted involves a willingness to carry out that vision, no matter the sacrifice. It’s a mindset that can be extremely difficult to achieve, but I think that’s simply how John’s brain works. He’s a creature of habit. So when he focused on his goals, he was devoted to the task at hand by sticking to the rules and guidelines that his coach gave him.

In a vacuum, devotion is a lot easier than real life. Without distractions, you could work out all day (think prison). But John wasn’t attempting his transformation in a vacuum. He had to deal with the challenges of seeing his friends go out for drinks or to a restaurant or seeing coworkers chow down on birthday cake every few days.

And yet John stayed utterly devoted to achieving his goals. I honestly don’t know if this is an innate trait or one that you can adopt–I think John is one of the fortunate few who have it in their DNA.

Patient: You can’t expect meaningful results overnight, not with anything. When you launch a new business, you’re not going to be a millionaire overnight. When you get married, you won’t have the perfect marriage from day 1. The same happens when you try to transform your health–it takes time.

Because there wasn’t much of a learning curve for John, it wasn’t long before he saw results. He lost 15 lbs in the first two weeks.  But every week didn’t see the same results.  He stayed focused and devoted to his goals whether nine pounds or four pounds.

Passionate: Passion doesn’t just ignite new projects and goals. In fact, a lot of people have that type of passion. Think about the last time you got excited about something big and didn’t follow through? I do that all the time.

The type of passion that truly successful people have is lasting passion. John has it. He reached his goal of 200 pounds in late May, but he still saw some things that he wanted to work on. He had the passion to keep going, to continue to move towards optimal health.

I’ve heard from a lot of people that one of the hardest things about losing weight is maintaining a healthy body after you’re reached your goal. John’s been working on that for over three months now, and he says he’s still learning. He says he’s like a colt talking his first steps in his new body.

And he’s not done. This surprised and really impressed me (it’s from the interview). John said, “I’ve never run a mile. So I’d like to run a 5K around April.” Becoming successful isn’t a one-time deal if you truly have that passion for the heart of what you’re trying to do.

Absorbent: The final category has to do with one’s willingness to absorb and remain open to new information. It takes a special talent to truly do this.

Honestly, I went into the interview with John with a goal in mind–after seeing what John did, I wanted to spread the message that anyone can make a significant change in their life merely by putting in the time and energy.

I no longer think that’s true.

I think that John is the type of person who can put his mind to something, stick with it, and achieve results. I don’t think everyone is like that. I think the key is that John opened himself up to new possibilities that he had never considered before. I’ve seen this absorbent nature in John for more than just becoming healthy–he embraces knowledge in many areas of his life.

As John says, “I didn’t use a quick fix, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t any out there, especially if you only want to drop 10 or 15 pounds. But there is value in sweat equity. Because I had to sacrifice to get it, I think I value the change more than if I had taken a magic pill.”

I think that sums up the difference between John and most other people. And I don’t mean to slight or discourage the general populace. But think about one thing in your life you’d like to significantly change, whether it be your health, your wealth, your relationship status, anything. Would you rather work  at that thing for the next 6-12 months, putting in a ton of time or energy, or would you swallow the magic pill if you could achieve your goal instantly without any effort? I know I’d take the magic pill for most things.

But I also know that I wouldn’t take the magic pill for a few specific things, and that’s a sign that those are the things that I might care enough about to actually succeed in. I think that’s a good meter of success.

John, you’ve inspired and impressed me. Thank you for sharing your story with me and my readers, and I look forward to seeing your other successes–health and otherwise–in the future.

It was the day before Thanksgiving, and the office was quiet. It was around 2:00, and I was looking for something to fill my time before my intended departure of 4:30.

A blog entry came to mind that I had read at lunch but quickly dismissed. It told the story of the CEO of a company called Modern Survey who spends a good chunk of his Thanksgiving Day calling his employees (and clients, but employees first) to tell each one of them specifically why he was thankful for them.

I dismissed the blog entry because I pictured Average Employee Guy getting that phone call and going through the motions of receiving praise until his boss let him get back to his family. My impression of it has more to do with my perception of receiving praise than Thanksgiving itself. ”Words of Affirmation” is one of my lowest love languages, so praise doesn’t do much for me…but that doesn’t mean that other people don’t value it. Also, it’s my perception that I thank my coworkers and employees all the time.

So at 2:00 on Wednesday, I though, “Why not?” I still wasn’t going to call my coworkers/employees and bother them on their day off, but I resolved to e-mail all 13 of them with specific details about why I’m thankful for them. They weren’t long e-mails, but they were individualized. I’m repeating that because I think that’s key. You probably say “thanks” to dozens of people every day. But to be truly thankful for something or someone, you have to tell them why.

I’m writing this blog entry because I am genuinely surprised by the reaction to those little notes of gratitude. My coworkers and employees are still on vacation, and yet I’ve already heard back from over half of them as they expressed how touched they were to be affirmed in that way. I should note that my e-mails had no questions in them, no prompts, no reason why anyone needed to reply (and I was careful not to write the e-mails as if I was fishing for compliments myself).

It was a little gesture in the grand scheme of things, just an hour or two of my time on the day before Thanksgiving. But it was absolutely worth my time, and I’ll definitely do it every year from now on. I’m writing this because it’s not too late for you to do the same for your employees/coworkers/clients/etc. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how touched people are by your words.

I fully intended to fulfill those promises to the 20 people (who replied within 24 hours of getting the Evite)–I even found the way to make the puppy happen (one puppy, not 20 puppies).

But it also made me think: What makes a VIP experience? How do people feel special? How do they walk away from an event feeling awesome?

Within a week or two of sending the Evite, I’ve had two VIP experiences that have made me redefine the concept. One bad, one good. Let’s start with the bad.

The first was a Gofobo.com invite to a very early screening of a movie called Young Adult. It’s written by Diablo Cody, acclaimed writer of Juno, and directed by Jason Reitman, of Up in the Air fame. I trust both of them to create a great film.

Now, Gofobo isn’t a true VIP experience, because anyone can sign up for the site. But it makes you feel like a VIP. You get to see movies way earlier than everyone else, and for free. So I felt very special that I was included.

However, what I learned is that VIP experiences can backfire if the experience itself isn’t good. In this case, if Young Adult had been a great movie–even just a good movie–I would have been blabbing about it to everyone I know. Instead, I’m here to tell you that it’s a pretty terrible movie. As in, I really just wanted it to go away. It features a clever juxtaposition: Charlise Theron, an exceedingly beautiful woman, playing a despicable person. It’s a clever concept, making the protagonist so damn unlikable. But it doesn’t work because she literally becomes unwatchable about 45 minutes into the movie. That’s all you can take before you want her to go away. But she doesn’t go away.

So I walked away from my Young Adult VIP experience wanting to tell people not to see the movie. VIP fail.

But tonight I was reminded of what a great VIP experience can do. I was invited to attend the launch party of the seventh iteration of Wasabi Sushi Bar here in the greater St. Louis area. For quite a while now, the Clayton location of Wasabi has been my go-to sushi restaurant when I get my monthly sushi craving. Their rolls are amazing.

So I got on the guest list, and I was allowed to invite three friends, including food bloggers Laura and Kris (the ability to include friends appears to be key for the VIP experience. You gain the power of inclusion).

Two things stood out from the evening: One, the food was varied and excellent. In a single pass through the buffet line (Wasabi isn’t a buffet restaurant, but that was how they operated for the launch party), I samples about 15-20 dishes, whereas when I normally eat sushi, I have 3 dishes at most. Thus they gave me the chance to expand my Wasabi palate at no cost to me.

Two, the place was packed. Absolutely packed. So even though we had the feeling of exclusivity of getting on the guest list, we were among many people who chose to come out to show their support for the new restaurant. In a way, popularity exceeded the effectiveness of exclusivity. It was cool to be in the most crowded restaurant in St. Louis tonight. And it was really cool to see how many people believe in the restaurant owners.

Wasabi, you have my heart. Jason Reitman and Diablo Cody, you’ve lost my trust.

What types of VIP experiences have you had?

If you’ve ever refereed a soccer game, you know that the customer isn’t always right.

If you’ve ever had any job anywhere, you know that the customer isn’t always right.

So why do we say that the customer is always right?

I’d like to suggest an alternative:

The customer is always respected.

The customer is always respected. Sure, they might claim that they didn’t order a chicken parmesan when you absolutely know they did, but you respect them anyway. Don’t make them feel dumb or inferior. Simply make them feel appreciated and respected even when you know they’re wrong.

That’s the key to good customer service.

Who is the star of your product? Do you want people to think your product is awesome, or would you rather they felt awesome about themselves because they used your product?

This really got me thinking about the concept of striving for awesomeness when creating a product or providing a service. Specifically in terms of making the client feel awesome.

Think about this the next time you go out to eat. The server will probably greet you, tell you the specials, take a drink order. But instead, what if he asked, “What can I do to make this dinner or evening awesome for you?” Or perhaps he doesn’t even say it, but that’s his goal in everything he does for you.

Or maybe think about it today while you’re at work. How can you make your clients feel awesome today? How can you make your coworkers do awesome work and feel good about it? How can you make your students feel awesome about figuring out a tough problem?

It’s pretty easy to make yourself feel awesome.  But it’s really not that much harder to make the people around you feel awesome too–it’s just a different frame of reference. Try it for a day to see how it works. The person who creates the most awesomeness around them today gets 12 Jamey Points.

Right now there are two food trucks. One of the trucks makes food to order, so there’s always a wait. It’s not uncommon for them to have a line of 25-50 people waiting to order or get their food.

The other truck has the food ready to go when you order, so you’re in and out instantly.

A few weeks ago, I complimented the owner of the second truck on their fast service. When I said that, he replied, “Actually, we could get your food out even faster, but we try to slow it down a bit to get a line.”

I heard the same thing on The Great Food Truck Race (great show) a few weeks ago: Once a truck got a line started, there was no stopping them. The short line would quickly turn into a long line.

Me, I hate waiting in lines. But having thought about them since the food truck guy mentioned it, I have to admit how powerful lines are. You always feel good when you choose a place with a line, because you know the food must be worth waiting for. It’s how I found my two favorite ramen restaurants in Kyoto–they had lines going down the block. And it’s why Ted Drewes tastes better than Mr. Wizard’s (holla, St. Louis!)–Ted Drewes always has a line.

I had just never thought that businesses would intentionally create lines–I thought lines were simply the product of popularity. But now I know. If you want to get people’s attention and make them feel good in advance about your product, find a way to create a line.

This year we crushed the previous record and finished in about 3 hours spread over two days. I learned a few things that apply to this sort of group grunt work (and probably to a lot of other facets of business as well):

1. Check Your Work: We had everything ready to do the entire envelope stuffing in a single day, and then we realized that we had made a mistake when sending the spreadsheet of everyone’s addresses to printer: The names didn’t match the addresses. It was a solvable problem that we fixed within two days, but it was a great reminder that spot checking can save so much time in the long run.
2. Small Components: I took a few ideas from Henry Ford and created an assembly line in which each person did the same task hundreds of times. Sure, there’s not much variety, but some jobs are done much smoother and faster when you break them down into manageable components.
3. The Progress Principle: As researched and written about by Teresa Amabile, “The single most important thing business leaders can do to improve morale is help employees feel they are making progress at work.” I tried to make sure that the volunteers always had a stack of envelopes or cards to work with and that they weren’t sitting around waiting for more materials. One guy was always finishing his stack right before I refilled it, and he had a momentary morale boost because he had finished a small accomplishment in the wake of an overwhelming goal. I then promptly crushed his morale by adding more envelopes to his stack.
4. A Clear Goal: At previous envelope stuffing parties, this thing always happens where we think we’re completely finished, and then someone uncovers one more box of envelopes and cards. There is very little more crushing than to think that you’ve finished a job, and all of a sudden you realize there’s more. So this year I made sure all of the materials were out in the open from the very beginning. With 4,000 invitations, that’s a lot of materials. But it presented a very clear picture of the goal, and as we stuffed, we gained a clear example of how much we’d accomplished and how much further we had to go.

I’m here to argue that companies should actually sponsor their own Secret Santa programs to improve employee satisfaction and performance.

Leave it to Santa to make Secret Santas seem creepy.

At my previous company, we had a great time playing Secret Santa every year (it was a far more successful program than our Secret Stalker initiative, which quickly got out of hand. Trev still owes thousands on surveillance equipment). We’d draw names out of a hat, give each other little gifts throughout December, and then top it off with one larger gift.

The key to Secret Santa, I think, is that you have to learn things about your coworkers that go beyond your professional relationships. Although you could learn many of those things if the Santas weren’t secret, I think you learn more about a person than if they simply hand you a list of stuff they want. And this is coming from someone who gets very little out of gifts and isn’t particularly good at buying gifts.

Recently I read some research about a large company that led two similar initiatives and measured results. In Group A were people who were asked to spend a certain amount of money on themselves. The people in Group B, conversely, were each asked to spend money buying a gift for someone else in Group B.

Group A showed no impact on satisfaction or performance. This was your standard Christmas bonus. No impact.

Group B, however, showed significant increases in satisfaction and performance. As the study noted, “they also became more interested in their teammate and were happier to help them further in multiple other ways.”

Think about this, because this is a big deal. As a manager, you have the choice to give Christmas bonuses to each employee, or you can pair each of your employees with one another and ask them to spend X amount of money on the other person. The first leaves employees no more satisfied than before. And yet the second, albeit somewhat counterintuitive, leads to significant improvements across the board.

Which are you going to choose?

It wouldn’t be ethical for me to say what I’m going to do–nor is it even my decision in the end–but I would love to try a hybrid of the two. Say your employees usually get $100 at Christmas. Why not give them $50 for themselves and $50 to spend on a specific other coworker? They’re still getting the same $100 that they’ve come to expect (in fact, if you have some employees that get a larger Christmas bonus, pair them with each other), but half of it comes in the form of care and attention from another coworker. And at my work we even have the added bonus of knowing each other’s workplace love languages. This could be pretty awesome.

Once I heard that line, I started realizing how often I was just waiting for my turn to speak. I do this all of the time. Do you? Think about that today. Be aware of it today.

The big problem with that way of life, especially when it comes to business, is that it’s completely counterproductive. The more you focus on YOU, the less people care.

Here's a great example for how to make it about the customer, not about your tip.

If you’ve tried to promote your business or your “personal brand” using social media the last few years, you probably realize what I mean. Go on Twitter or Facebook at some of the businesses you’ve Liked. Some of them write incessantly about themselves. They talk about their promotions, their products, their visions. (Now, I actually like it when businesses talk about the people behind the business–I think it’s important to put a human face to impersonal companies.)

Others focus on THEM (well, you). They feed you information that you can use, stories that will make you laugh or cry or think, or maybe a forum to share your thoughts. Somehow by focusing on you instead of them, they manage to attract way more fans.

I was listening to an awesome talk by Simon Sinek the other day that had a great example about how focusing on THEM can make a huge impact on the bottom line. (By the way, watch the whole talk–it’s the most informative and inspiring 30 minutes you’ll spend today.)

Sinek went up to a homeless woman in an urban area and asked her how much money she makes on an average day. She said about $20. At the time, she was holding a sign that was all about her. You’ve seen these signs. She was out of work, 5 kids, no husband, back pain, etc.

Sinek asked her if he could rewrite her sign for one day. She had nothing to lose, so she accepted.

2 hours later, she had made $40.

That’s twice as much as she makes a day. But Sinek pulled it off. What did the new sign say?

“If you only give once a month, please consider me next time.”

She made the sign about THEM. She’s putting herself in the giver’s shoes; she knows a passerby can’t give to everyone, so if they only give once a month, she’s saying that her cause is legitimate. She’ll still be there in a month.

It’s tough to be a great listener every time. Our thoughts drift, and maybe we have something really clever to say. But start to be aware of whether you’re truly listening or if you’re just waiting for your turn to talk.

Make it about THEM.

Do you have any examples regarding times that you’ve made it about them…or about you?