relationships

Dustin Hoffman Suprises Me with an Insight About Women (and People)

Dustin Hoffman Suprises Me with an Insight About Women (and People)

The other day a video clip of Dustin Hoffman talking about the movie Tootsie went viral. At first I didn’t pay any attention to it, as I haven’t seen the movie. But I guess it reached a critical mass of people sharing it, so I took a look. I was genuinely surprised and moved by […]


10 Ways I Rock My Relationships

10 Ways I Rock My Relationships

Yesterday I wrote a post called “10 Ways I Blew My Relationships.” A friend suggested to me that I counter it with a post about how I’ve rocked (in a good way) my relationships, and I thought it would be a nice flip side to yesterday’s entry. Perhaps you can use this entry as a […]


10 Ways I Blew My Relationships

10 Ways I Blew My Relationships

I’ve been single for a while now. My post-college dating history includes a 3.5-year relationship with a woman who moved in with me for a while, a 1-year long distance relationship….and then lots and lots of dates over the last 4 years. Recently I read a blog entry called 16 Ways I Blew My Marriage […]


How to Let Strangers Decide If You Should Get a Vasectomy

How to Let Strangers Decide If You Should Get a Vasectomy

Way back in 2008, I wrote a blog entry called, I Own That Guy’s Arm. In it I proposed that I launch an IPO for myself, letting investors purchase shares in me and have a say in the choices I make on a daily basis. The benefit for the investors is that they could make a […]


Do You Try to Win Conversations?

Do You Try to Win Conversations?

Conversations aren’t battlefields. There aren’t winners and losers. But that doesn’t stop us from trying. Today I was having a conversation over e-mail with a few colleagues about an issue that arose at work. There were many different sides to the story, several layers of miscommunication, and dropped balls by several people. Overall, we were […]


Serial Dater or Serial Killer?

Serial Dater or Serial Killer?

If you’re a guy who has tried online dating, I almost guarantee that you’ve probably had a conversation like this by text or e-mail before the first date: YOU: Would you like to meet up for drinks sometime this week? HER: Sure, I’m free Thursday. YOU: Perfect. Do you want to meet there, or should […]


Love, Fights, and The Office

Note: This contains spoilers for tonight’s episode of The Office. If you don’t watch the show, I think you can still connect to what I’m going to say below about relationships. This has been a weird and interesting final season of The Office. The boss has been gone for almost the entire season, Oscar had an affair […]


A Guaranteed Soulmate

I just finished watching a really interesting romantic comedy with a slight sci-fi twist (keep reading–it’s very slight!) that posed some great questions that I will now pose for you. And myself. Because I write this blog. The movie, TiMer, presents the idea that (a) every person has exactly one soulmate, (b) every pair of […]


Mars vs. Venus: Can Workplace Romance Work?

Mars vs. Venus: Can Workplace Romance Work?

Today I have the latest in the long-running, multi-contributor series called “Mars vs. Venus.” In these posts we explore a topic (usually relationships) from the male angle (mine) and the female angle (in this case, Katy’s). We do not read each other’s posts in advance, so I’m just as curious as you are to read […]


Relationships Are Just Like Soccer Cleats: A Life Lesson from My Father

Relationships Are Just Like Soccer Cleats: A Life Lesson from My Father

The other day I noticed that a pair of my dress shoes had some deep scuff marks on the front edge. If I didn’t know any better, I might have thought about buying a new pair of shoes. That’s what we do, right? Something gets old, so we throw it out and buy something new. […]


Can Introverts Love Extroverts?

Can Introverts Love Extroverts?

A friend posed this question to me today. I had to ask for clarification–I’m sure many introverts fall in love with extroverts, and vice versa. She clarified that she is curious about whether or not introverts can show their love to extroverts. Can introverts–those who typically need a lot of time by themselves to re-energize, […]


How to Write an Even More Perfect Online Dating Profile

How to Write an Even More Perfect Online Dating Profile

Earlier this year I wrote an entry called How to Write the Perfect Online Dating Profile, and it’s been one of the most well-read entries on the blog since then. Recently I decided to start offering profile rewrites for people for a $39 fee, or free for a temporary amount of time. A few people–all […]


You Should Go on a Bookstore Date

You Should Go on a Bookstore Date

Note: I don’t go into details about dates on this blog. Except for the really, really, really, really bad ones (yes, those are four different links). And even those I wait for months to share. On today’s entry, I’m going to talk about a recent date, but only in the context of this date as a […]


Mars vs. Venus: Can Long-Distance Relationships Work?

Mars vs. Venus: Can Long-Distance Relationships Work?

This is a Mars vs. Venus entry, meaning I’m going to share my male perspective, and then at the end of the entry you can click over to my blogger friend Katy’s blog for the female perspective on long-distance relationships. I’m qualified to give the male perspective because I’ve been in a number of long-distance […]


The Forgotten

The Forgotten

Today I was in the area of a Lion’s Choice (it’s essentially Arby’s, St. Louis style) for lunch, so I offered to pick up food for a coworker. However, I got so excited when I saw they had root beer floats on the menu (they’re my kryptonite, if kryptonite is delicious and drinkable) that I […]


Online Dating Bingo

Online Dating Bingo

Because I’ve been off the online dating circuit for a while now, I thought it would be a good time to post about some of those experiences. What better way to do so than play online bingo! If you’ve participated in online dating, you know what every first date is different, and you’re never quite […]


Can You Be Judgmental About Judging?

Can You Be Judgmental About Judging?

I haven’t been a paying member of Match.com since January, but I’ve left my profile up because it links to my blog (always trying to find ways to get new readers in on the conversation). Pretty much every day Match will send me an e-mail saying something like, “She’s interested in you, and you have […]


The Art of Flirtation: An Awkward Male’s Perspective

The Art of Flirtation: An Awkward Male's Perspective

This is a Mars vs. Venus entry, meaning I’m going to share my male perspective, and then at the end of the entry you can click over to my blogger friend Katy’s blog for the female perspective on flirting. I’ve always enjoyed flirting, but over the past year I’ve had a series of epiphanies about […]


How to Write the Perfect Online Dating Profile

How to Write the Perfect Online Dating Profile

I’m taking a little break from dating so I can focus on writing the novel, but out of curiosity I still find myself checking on my “matches” on Match and OkCupid (I’m telling you, online dating is very addicting). I see the same mistakes over and over in online dating profiles, and so I thought […]


The Power of Surprises

The Power of Surprises

I believe that there are two types of people in the world: Those who like surprises, and those who don’t. Of course, there are some grey areas. I like very few surprises, but I’m delighted by a Slurpee or cookie showing up at my desk unannounced. And there are people who generally love surprises who […]


Week of Worst First Dates: Day 4

Week of Worst First Dates: Day 4

As you’ve seen, the dates this week really haven’t been that bad. Annoying, perhaps, but nothing that caused me any permanent angst. Today’s date, the final date I’ll write about, is the exception. To be fair, there are multiple things I did wrong with this date. A woman contacted me on Match from a city […]


Week of Worst First Dates: Day 3

We’ve come to the blind date. The one, the only, blind date. A female friend asked me early last year if she could set me up on a blind date. She had a friend who wanted to set up her friend on a blind date, so there were two degrees of separation between me and […]


Week of Worst First Dates: Day 2

Week of Worst First Dates: Day 2

My second worst date story involves a woman here in St. Louis. A rather beautiful woman, really. I was somewhat surprised when she started talking to me, but I was happy to go along with it. Let’s call her Barbara. We had a great rapport going–lots of long e-mails that varied between flirty and funny […]


Week of Worst First Dates: Day 1

Week of Worst First Dates: Day 1

As a special Christmas gift to you, dear reader, I have decided to share with you this week the stories of the 4 worst first dates I’ve been on since signing up for online dating. 4 out of 50 first dates from online dating really isn’t a bad number at all. And as you’ll see, […]