Archive for June, 2008

Common Misconception #3: Quitting Cold Turkey

“I wish I knew how to quit you, cold turkey.” Many have tried it. Most have failed. It’s the day after Thanksgiving, and your fridge is stocked with cold turkey. White meat, dark meat, little pieces of grizzle that you pick out. You look at the stack of meat and think, “Today is the day. […]

Resolution Check-In: Halfway There

Six months have passed since I made my original list of New Year’s resolutions. I last checked in on January 29; midway through the year seems like a good time to look at the list again. Finish the novel. Status: Poor. Reason: I actually don’t feel all that bad about this one, since I have […]

News Alert: Mike Myers Is Still Funny

I just finished watching an episode of The Daily Show from last week on my TiVo. Mike Myers was the guest. Even though this should be expected of a comedian, I was caught off guard at how funny he was. I was laughing out loud for a good portion of the interview. Jon Stewart, who […]

A Fistful of Potatoes

What would you think if you walked out of your apartment building at 7:15 am and saw a guy wearing flip-flops, Adidas pants, and a t-shirt carrying a sack of potatoes on his way into the building?

Management Tactic #22: Alcohol

As my current and former coworkers could tell you, I can be kind of anal. I wouldn’t say that I’m stubborn, per se—really, I’m quite reasonable—but I have a certain way of doing things that I generally think is correct. I’m open to suggestions, but I never like to hear “this is just always the […]

The Secret to Getting Published

Just the other day I was reading EW’s list of the 50 new classic books. As I read through the list, I was amazed by the breadth and depth of the books. And I was saddened by the fact that I have yet to be published and thus am not anywhere close to being put […]

The Spider

I was talking with two of my cousins (21 months and 3 years old) at a family reunion this weekend, and they informed me of a spider they had seen around the house. Not just any spider, mind you. A tiny spider, an “itsy-bitsy” spider, if I may quote the progeny. Needless to say, I […]

The Rally

I attended my first political rally today. Beyond voting, I’m not at all active in politics, so the rally scene isn’t really for me. But Caroline’s boss’s boss’s boss is running for governor, so Caroline asked me to come and hang on her arm and look pretty. That’s what I do best. Jay Nixon, the […]

A Fan of Cardinals Fans

I grew up in Chesterfield, Virginia, which is right next to the former Confederate capital, Richmond. We don’t have any professional sports teams in Richmond, just a few college teams and a minor-league baseball team, the Richmond Braves. My memories of going to Braves games consist mainly of sitting on cold, wet, aluminum bleachers, dividing […]

The Hayaben Story

I’ve had the pleasure and the honor of living in Japan on three separate occasions: Twice in high school for summer-vacation homestays in Hiroshima, and once in college for my junior year in an apartment in Kyoto. I kept extensive journals of my time over there, and I sent the majority of the content of […]

The Burger Bar

There seems to be a new trend of restaurants called “burger bars.” They’re nice, posh restaurants that employ attractive servers and offer expensive drinks and expensive burgers on their menus. As far as I can tell, the concept was created when some dude had the following internal dialogue: “I totally want a burger for dinner […]

How $3 Changed My Life

Months ago, I pledged to single-handedly save the environment by using canvas bags while grocery shopping instead of plastic bags. It was an ambitious goal, one only accomplished through a combination of tenacity, consistency, and memory. Apparently I have none of those traits, because I hardly ever use the canvas bags. This hasn’t been a […]

St. Louis: A Gorilla-Free City

A recent study at the Addictive Behaviors Research Center at the University of Washington published the following in Applied Cognitive Psychology: “To show that people can suffer impairment after one drink, subjects were asked to count the number of times a ball was passed during a 25-second basketball video. When a person in a gorilla […]

Gee, Mail?

Has anyone else noticed that the Gmail logo still contains the word “beta?” Why is Gmail still in beta testing? Gmail has been available since April 2004, is used by millions of people (50 million in 2006…I can’t find the number for now, but it must be near 100 million), and works better than any […]

Duty Free

There was a very different feeling in the assembly room today as the 200 or so remaining jurors waited to see if they’d be selected. Yesterday, whenever numbers were called, people wanted their numbers to be called. They wanted to get it over with, get on with the selection. People were curious about what lay […]

The Rules of Jury Duty

Today I did my civic duty and showed up at the St. Louis courthouse. After the security guard ushered me through the metal detector with, “Step on through, handsome,” I joined several hundred other potential jurors in the waiting room. We watched a short video and received a pocket-sized booklet that contains the following rules […]

Best of the Blog Rundown

I have a list of  some classic entries for those of you who are (a) bored at work, (b) new to this blog, or (c) want a comprehensive list of the best-received entries of the first year of this blog. In no particular order: Jamey Decides That He Will Replace His Living Room Furniture with […]

I Lived Through a Tornado That Touched Down 12 Miles from My Work: A Survivor’s True Tale of Survival Against All Odds

At 2:25 this afternoon, a deadly funnel cloud touched down 12 miles from where I work. 9 hours later, against all odds, I’m alive. I am a survivor. This is my story. I was sitting at my desk this afternoon at work, warily eyeing the rapidly darkening sky outside my office. I was hoping to […]

Best of the Blog: Year One

One year ago today, I wrote an innocuous blog entry on LiveJournal after creating a user account. It read: “I’m not sure how often I’ll use this LiveJournal platform, but it’s an interesting form of media I might explore. I’m basically just posting this to see what my journal will look like.” 190 posts later […]

The Caroline Vault: Cue Card Guy

Whenever Jamey inadvertently says something that I might construe as inappropriate (sometimes even borderline offensive…), after he realizes the error of his ways, he usually tries to cover his tracks by saying something overly nice, in a scripted voice. For example, if my hair is all messed up in the morning when I get up, […]

Management Tactic #8: Compassion

I handwrite a lot of thank-you notes at work. Part of the reason I do so is that my printer is slow and crappy; I don’t have the patience to wait for a page to print. But the main reason is that it adds a personal touch to a world of mass mailings and junk […]

Four Weddings and a Fundraising Event

I attended four weddings over the month of May—one on each of the last four consecutive weekends. Each one was unique and memorable. One was a Hindu wedding where the groom rode in on a horse. Two were Catholic—one of which had a 25-minute ceremony, the other a 105-minute ceremony. One was the first wedding […]