The Top Festivus Grievances of 2009: 11-20

Brought to us by the lovely Neeraja are Festivus grievances 11-20. The Top 10 will be posted on Thursday evening. 21-30 are here.

20. People who think Facebook is different than Myspace. You’ve been fooled!

19. People who walk around with ibuds in their ears all the time. I’m sure “your soundtrack” is great, but is real life really that boring?

18. The term “Been there, done that.” It’s condescending bullshi*t!

17. What, now if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it? Rings are expensive, and I like a lot of things.

16. “That’s what she said” jokes. She didn’t say it—your dirty mind just thought it.

15. Professional golfers having fewer than double-digit mistresses.

14. When Fr. Gary hits on my sister. And then my girlfriend. And then my mom. And then me.

13. Facebook profile pics with more than one person in the photo. It’s not a couple’s profile—it’s yours!

12. Grieving about Twitter one year and then using it prolifically the next.

11. Sportscasters who refer to an injury solely by the injured body part (e.g., “He’ll be out 3-6 weeks with a knee” or “He has an ACL.”) No sh*t. He has two ACLs. Everybody does.

0 thoughts on “The Top Festivus Grievances of 2009: 11-20”

  1. Though, I agree with #11, I have two gripes about it climbing that high in the rankings:

    1) Bill Simmons has been on this phenomenon for years. (See the “EAGLES (-7) over Redskins” section at the link below to a 2006 post of his.)

    2) Not everybody has two ACLs. (Exhibit 1, Hines Ward)

    I must say, it’s exciting not knowing whether my grievences were deemed to fall within the “mediocre to crap” category or made the Top 10.

    Go Chuck Norris.


Leave a Reply

Discover more from

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading