Who Is the Ultimate Man?

Over the years, there have been dozens of men who were the ultimate men of their time. Guys like Clint Eastwood, Burt Reynolds, and Bruce Campbell.

But lately, thanks to a squadron of loyal fans and some very effective marketing campaigns, there are a few men that have become the very personification of the ultimate man. Thanks to the thousands of quotes attributed to them, they are almost caricatures of actual men. They are living legends.

These men need no introduction. I’m sure you’ll recognize all of them:

Chuck Norris
Old Spice Man
Dos Equis Guy

So I ask you today: Among these men, who is the ultimate man, and why?

20 thoughts on “Who Is the Ultimate Man?”

  1. Perhaps I’m the only out-of-touch person who reads this blog, but is Dos Equis Guy someone most people have heard of, or was he added as a joke? I looked him up online, and clearly he does exist, but the site I went to didn’t show much about him.

    Also, since you have TiVO and you no longer have to watch comercials, how do you know about Old Spice Man and Dos Equis Guy?

    Reply
  2. I have another nomination for the Ultimate Man: Bat Masterson

    How’s this for a manly one-sentence Wikipedia bio:
    William Barclay “Bat” Masterson (November 26, 1853 – October 25, 1921) was a figure of the American Old West known as a buffalo hunter, U.S. Army scout, avid fisherman, gambler, frontier lawman, U.S. Marshal, and sports editor and columnist for the New York Morning Telegraph.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bat_Masterson

    Also, I think it’s a shame that two of the three nominees for Ultimate Man are both fictional and products of marketing campaigns. Surely the Ultimate Man wouldn’t bother wasting his time hawking hygiene products or Mexican beer?!

    Reply
  3. I love the Dos Equis guy! Mostly because the commercials are so ridiculous. However, the Old Spice guy bugs me. There’s no level of appeal to him. Plus my dad uses Old Spice… turn off.

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    • And Old Spice has aluminum in it. A real man would never use a product that has been linked to causing medical issues such as Alzheimer’s. Sure Dos Equis can cause a slew of issues, but it’s pretty clear that alcohol isn’t good. Whereas the aluminum/deodorant issue isn’t as publicized.

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      • I had no idea! I use Old Spice. No wonder I’m so forgetful. What deodorant would you suggest? There should be a Dos Equis deodorant.

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  4. Holy smokes Jamey, you stole one of my blog ideas I was working on for this week. I was going to do the “Mount Rushmore” of awesome men, and you nailed three of them. My fourth was “Black Dynamite,” which, if you haven’t seen the movie, he fits right in with this group. Or just check out the trailer on YouTube.

    My vote goes to TMIMITW. Why? Even though he is a ripoff of the Chuck Norris Facts, he actually gets me to order Dos Equis when I’m in certain moods, just so I can say, “I don’t always drink beer, but when I do . . . I prefer Dos Equis.”

    Reply
    • Wow, sorry about that. You should still write the post–all I did was post some photos! Black Dynamite certainly belongs in this group (which, I must say, is quite diverse!)

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  5. Of the three options here, I’d go with Dos Equis Guy. And I think Black Dynamite is ridiculous.

    What about, like, Steven King? Give me a brainy man. Like a hunky chess champion who rescues babies from burning buildings. Daily. These are my rules.

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  6. Old Spice guy, of course. He knows he’s a cliche. And he’s funny.

    The Aluminum/Alzheimer’s link was au courant 25 or 30 years ago, but today (2010) few researchers think aluminum exposure is a risk factor. There is some research into the way the body processes metals generally, and perhaps there is something in this mechansim that might possibly be linked to Alzheimer’s, but nobody knows. https://is.gd/eB7R2 https://is.gd/eB8k8

    t

    Reply
  7. Maybe Chuck Norris was a fragment of the Ultimate Man, but if Bruce Lee was alive he would destroy Chuck and the other two pretenders at the same time

    Reply

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