19. Non-foaming hand soap—You think I have the time or energy to make you foam?
18. Bread = good. Bread + butter = great. Bread ‘n Butter pickles? = Taste like feet.
17. Mothballs! Not quite as tasty as gumballs.
16. East. Always a sunrise, never a sunset.
15. The downfall of the English language. It’s sad that, “Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive” (Shakespeare) has devolved into, “That bitch a liar!”
14. That the restaurant Panda Express actually has no meals with panda meat.
13. Bed bugs—For making their way into almost as many beds as Tiger Woods.
12. Karaoke—It’s torture no matter what side of the mic you’re on.
11. Crate & Barrel–I’ve searched high and low and found neither crates nor barrels!
Drumroll for the Top 10…