“You Got Raptured!” should totally be the name for a new game show.
If you’re reading this, you didn’t get raptured on Saturday. If you’re anything like me, you were sitting around with friends at a BBQ, enjoying the breeze and the chirping of crickets and frogs (or whatever chirps here in St. Louis. Mosquitos? Clydesdales?), not waiting to get beamed up to heaven.
But perhaps you were talking about the rapture. Or the absurdity that most Americans knew about a random prophecy by some crazy dude. Why is that guy’s prophecy any more newsworthy than prophecies from street drunks and your crazy uncle?
It sure made for good conversation. And so I ask you this: Say that you found yourself being raptured on Saturday. You’re on your way to heaven or whatever glittery afterlife you believe in, but you look to your left and realize that your significant other isn’t with you. He/she didn’t make the cut.
So you’re given a choice: You can continue with your rapture, or you can go back down to your loved one’s side and endure hell on earth with him/her (I think that’s what happens after the rapture. Hell comes to earth in the form of earthquakes and spider monkeys and demon beasts). What do you choose?