My Greatest Fear #34: Getting Stuck with a Full Bladder

A few years ago, I was on a flight back to St. Louis. I kind of had to go to the bathroom just before we started our descent, but I was in a good plane-coma state, so I decided to wait until we arrived to use the more spacious airport bathrooms.

Big mistake.

We ended up taxiing around the runway for at least 45 minutes. At first it was because there was another plane in the way, but later I think the pilot was simply having fun at my bladder’s expense.

It was one of those situations where my bladder really started to hurt. I could feel my temperature rising as my internal organs began to shut down. I rehearsed a speech to the flight attendant to try to convince her to let me use the bathroom, but I didn’t want to make a scene. I also contemplated peeing just a little bit, just enough to relieve the pressure, but I didn’t want to open up the waterworks.

I lived through it, obviously, but the experience scarred me. Ever since then, before I leave any place in a vehicle that I could potentially become trapped in, I go to the bathroom.

I’ve experienced this at work lately quite a bit. I’ve been working late, and often I try to fit in one more thing before leaving. I drink a lot of water, so I inevitably have to go to the bathroom, and almost every day I have the following internal dialogue before I leave:

“Okay dude, time to go. You live 5 minutes away. Let’s just get home to the cats and pee in your own toilet.”

“That sounds pretty great…but…”

“But what?”

“But what if on the way home I get in a car accident after staring at a girl in yoga pants jogging in the park? What if I’m pinned in the car? It could be hours before I have access to another toilet?”

“Come on, dude–what are the odds of that happening?”

“You never know. Today could be the day. I’ll just pee here.”

And I do. Every day.

Do you have similar concerns? Have you ever been trapped with a full bladder?