How Does One Drink Out of a Beer Bottle on a Date?

The easy answer to this question is, duh, don’t drink beer out of a bottle on a date. Pour it into a glass.

But let’s say you don’t have that option. Or you don’t want that option because you like drinking beer out of a bottle. Hypothetically.

When you bring the bottle to your lips, particularly when you get to the point that the bottle must be perpendicular with your face for you to take a swig, which direction do you face? Do you face forward as you listen to the woman talk, blocking her face with the bottle? Do you turn to the side to give her a mugshot view? If so, which side? The same side as the arm that is holding the bottle? Or the other? Or perhaps you should use both hands, or none?

Speaking of hands, where should you grasp the bottle? At the bottom or near the top? Does a gentleman extend his pinky as he drinks a fine lager, or is a firm grasp on the bottle with all fingers more important?

And what about lips on the bottle? I’m guessing that you let your lips form a narrow channel into which the beer can flow. But it leaves the slight possibility that some beer will escape onto your face. Thus should you form a complete suction around the bottleneck? I feel like that would look weird.

These are the things I think about on dates.