Screw It, We’re Adding a Third Layer

Triple-Double OreoToday I was doing some grocery shopping, and as is my way, I eventually gravitated into the cookie/candy aisle. The Oreos instantly caught my eye. I crave Oreos approximately 4 times a year. For the rest of the time I acknowledge Oreos for what they are: stale compartments for high-fructose corn syrup.

But for those four times, dip me in milk and call me a cookie, because I want Oreos in my mouth!

Such was the case today. However, as you probably know, there are like 20 varieties of Oreos. In addition to the standard version, you have double decker Oreos, Oreos dipped in chocolate, mint Oreo cream, vanilla Oreo cookies, and so on. It’s kind of daunting.

I was caught in a paradox of choice until something shiny and new caught my eye. It beckoned to me. A harp played somewhere in the distance.

Triple-Double Oreos.

That’s right. Cookie. Cream. Cookie. Cream. Cookie.

Bam. That just happened.

I would have loved to be in the executive Oreo meeting when it was decided that a third layer should be added. I’m sure there were tons of charts, schematics, and market research proposing various ideas until the president of Oreos–Mr. Oreo–checks his watch, realizes he’s going to miss his afternoon golf session, and says, “Screw it, we’re adding a third layer.”

I hope this is the start of Oreos with more and more layers. Someday I’ll open a container of Oreos to find that each of the three rows will contain three long Oreos, each pasted together by sugar cream.

What do you think about the triple-double? Has Oreo gone too far?

4 thoughts on “Screw It, We’re Adding a Third Layer”

Leave a Reply

Discover more from

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading