My 12-year-old cat, Biddy, has been in the pet hospital for over 3 days. Today I was allowed to visit him, which was really nice. He lay down on the tablet as I scratched his head, encouraged him to get his bladder working again, and filled him in on what he was missing.
Needless to say, it was bittersweet to leave him behind (though hopefully not for much longer). Right next door to the clinic was a QT, and I’ve learned recently that QT (QuikTrip) is kind of magical, so I decided to stop there for a treat.
I ended up selecting a frozen Snickers bar, an excellent choice for a hot day. However, it was also a melty choice, and soon my fingers were sticky. I didn’t want to lick them, as I had Biddy slobber all over them.
So I did what any true American would do: I wiped my hands on my jeans.
I realized immediately afterwards just how amazing the act of using jeans this way is. Because whatever was on your hands just kind of disappears into the jeans. And jeans are just rough enough that your hands actually feel cleaner afterwards.
How many other garments can you say this about? You can’t just wipe hands on your shirt. Nor is your skin a great canvas for chocolate. But jeans? Jeans are napkins disguised as pants. They’re even better than napkins, because they’re just as usable post-wipe as pre-wipe.
In fact, the same goes for when you wash your hands in a restroom, only to find there’s no towel. Jeans soak that water right up without displaying to the world that you just wiped your hands on them.
Well done, jeans. You’re the best.